Noobly
"I'm N00bly, who are you?" - N00bly to Fart Garfunkle and "Snake" '' Noobly is the main protagonist of Minecraft: the N00b Adventures. He is the least experienced in Minecraft, but is the one who usually solves most of their problems. His first signature weapon is a golden sword that he found in Cavern Chaos, which is broken when they encounter the Enderdragon. He later receives a diamond sword as a good luck token from YoDa_MoRpHeUs, at the end of Here Be Dragons. He is also the one with the highest deductive skills. History (Ep.1) The show begins with Noobly joining the server and saying that Minecraft is "So blocky, yet so cool!" and soon meets Fart Garfunkel and Pooplooser_69 (who prefers to be called Snake), who have been hiding from a horde of zombies overnight. After some hasty introductions, they all decide to head for a highly populated community East of the spawn point, which Noobly had heard of when he joined the server. Later, when the sun is setting, they all get resources to build a house to defend themselves from the monsters. (Ep.2) Monsters attack that night, with a pair of skeletons, hordes of zombies and roughly two spiders participating in the assault. In the first assault, Fart is hit with an arrow from a skeleton and is mortally wounded (rather curious, as he appeared to be at full health at the start of the attack), falling to the floor. Noobly rushes to help him and extricates the arrow, but Fart decides to respawn, handing Noobly all the items in his inventory. Noobly finds a golden apple amidst Fart's stuff, and offers it to him, saving his life. Once he has donned his signature '''shades', Fart rushes up to the battlements of the house, takes Snake's bow and fights off the mobs with incredible speed and accuracy. Noobly fights off the zombies with Fart's shovel, and Snake beats away the spiders with his bare hands. It seems that the group could possibly survive the night, but for the arrival of a Creeper, which Fart is unable to kill with his bow, due to suffering connection problems. The Creeper blows up part of the wall, allowing the mobs to enter. Noobly uses the shovel and digs into a cave, allowing them to escape. Fart praises Noobly on his quick thinking, and Snake illuminates the cave with a torch, revealing a massive cave system. (Ep.3) The group continue travelling, and find a room that contains a chest. Upon opening it, they each find an item that they like. Fart gets a bucket, Snake gets a compass (which shows that they are still travelling East) and clock, (which shows that it is day) and Noobly receives his signature golden sword (which Fart mistakenly believes is a good sword, due to it being made of gold). Snake asks why such items would just be abandoned, and their question is answered by the presence of a zombie spawner. The group mine their way out of the room, and Fart finds a powered minetrack heading towards the surface. They head up to the surface, and the railway ends, leading them to fall in a lake. They discover that just beyond the lake lies the fabled community they were travelling to. Upon arriving, they discover it populated by (and led by) the single curious individual Gaylord Steambath (aka. God), who states that every other citizen has left the community for reasons he does not want to mention. (Ep.4)The group settle in, Fart finally commencing work on his rollercoaster (which was his intention from the very start of the show), Snake working on his pixel art and Noobly building his own house. Steambath visits Fart's rollercoaster, blowing it up, then Snake's pixel art, setting it on fire. When Snake furiously asks for Steambath's motive, Steambath states "Entertainment, my friend, entertainment". While inexplicably sleeping, Noobly is visited by female Minecraft player Pwny Rainb0w, who warns him, along with Fart and Snake, who arrive later, to leave the server immediately. She explains the server's past: the server used to be extremely popular and peaceful, until Gaylord Steambath was given administrative power over the server, and began griefing everyone's constuctions. Many attempted to kill the Steambath, but his infinite supplies of diamond armor, swords and golden apples was what allowed him to easily kill them. He then teleported the rebellious players underground, and blew them apart with dynamite. The rest he exiled into the Nether, at the mercy of the Ghasts. Fart, however, is more suprised at the fact that girls play Minecraft, a source of irritation for Pwny. All of a sudden, Pwny is killed by Steambath with a bow, who then bans her from the server. Exposed, Steambath states this: he will not blow them up or exile them to the Nether, in exchange that they continue to create structures, which he will destroy, in accordance with his habits. Noobly, on behalf of the group, reluctantly agrees. Once Steambath has disappeared, Snake and Fart gang up on Noobly for agreeing, but Noobly reveals that he only agreed so they can gather supplies against Steambath, so to kill him and teach him a lesson. (Ep.5)It is revealed that the group is greatly underprepared and understocked (only having 1 shovel, 1 sword, 1 pickaxe, 2 bows, coal, arrows, 1 bucket, 1 compass, 1 clock and a cooked pork chop that Fart found on the ground). Noobly and Fart agree to leave in search of diamonds, while Snake keeps Steambath busy. The instant Noobly and Fart take their leave, Steambath teleports Snake to him, forcing him to create pixel art for him to destroy. Meanwhile, in the wilderness, Fart discovers a cave to mine in. Noobly agrees to stand guard, and eventually, night falls. Noobly sees an Enderman, which disappears when he looks away. The cave entrance is then attacked by 2 skeletons and a spiderjockey. Noobly and Fart quickly block up the entrance to the cave. Once they are inside, Fart breaks his pickaxe in a renewed vigour for diamonds. The pair while away the time by listening to Fart talk about his experiences in Call of Duty. Noobly suddenly realises that he has forgotten the clock, and checks the barricade to see if daylight has broken, only to see the Enderman, who gets closer when he diverts his attention to call Fart. The Enderman suddenly appears at the barricade, leaving the episode on a cliffhanger. (Ep.6)Snake has built several pixel arts for Steambath to destroy, who suddenly teleports to Noobly and Fart, stealing their bucket, which could be a critical tool against the Enderman. Upon returning to Snake, Steambath cryptically informs him that they are having "buckets of fun". Noobly and Fart prepare to fight the Enderman as it gets past their barricade, but as soon as it enters, it teleports again. Fart throws away his shovel in relief, just as the Enderman appears behind them. Fortunately, they are saved by 6-7 year old veteran player YoDa_MoRpHeUs, who, after killing the Enderman, states that while he avoids any contact with "corrupt individuals", (eg.Steambath) he will allow them to mine diamonds from a cave that he has found, in exchange that they help him clean it out of mobs. They enter the cave, fighting through 4 zombies (which YoDa dismembers all by himself, and which Fart foolishly eats the rotting flesh of, mistaking it for beef jerky), a group of skeletons on a ledge (which allows Noobly to figure out use of the bow) and a huge slime (which Fart keeps beating with his shovel, long after it is dead). They find a Stronghold, (Ep.7)and enter, where YoDa uses the Ender pearl he obtained from the dead Enderman to seek an Ender portal. As they travel through the stronghold, Fart explains to Noobly the reason behind Snake's username: he believed that it was a hack that would gain him infinite diamonds, but really just a hoax which made him look stupid. Meanwhile, Steambath has worked Snake to exhaustion, and pushes the line when he calls him his username, causing Snake to call him an "asshole". Apparently insulted by Snake's use of profanity, Steambath says that Noobly and Fart have died (convinced that they could not have survived after he stole their bucket), and teleports Snake to them. Upon appearing, Snake begs them for food, and Fart gives him the porkchop, quelling his hunger. YoDa then leads the group to an Ender portal, and states that the choice is theirs if they wish to enter. Despite Snake being initially cautious and doubtful about the possible risk and definite uncertainty, Fart immediately enters, wearing his signature shades, followed by YoDa, then Noobly and Snake. They arrive in the End, where several Endermen are present. However, just as they are about to attack, they suddenly flee, for the appearance of the Enderdragon. As it swoops in on them, Fart puts his shades back on, stating "well boys, it looks like this is the End". (Ep.8)As the Enderdragon swoops them, the group wonder how they can kill the Enderdragon. YoDa shoots the Enderdragon with an arrow, with is soon healed by an obsidian tower's healing crystal. Understanding that the crystal is what is preventing them from killing the dragon, they split up, with Noobly and YoDa fending off the dragon from the group, while Fart and Snake head to the top of the tower, to find some means of destroying the crystal. Upon reaching the top, Snake wonders how they can destroy the crystal, but Fart cuts to the chase and shoots it with his bow, causing it to explode and nearly kill them. The dragon then starts attacking Fart and Snake, just as Fart runs out of ammunition. Noobly quickly hurries to their assistance, but breaks his golden sword in the process. However, they are saved by YoDa_MoRpHeUs, who airshots the dragon, causing it to run away. After being resupplied, Noobly, Fart and Snake coordinate themselves into a firing line on top of the tower, firing their arrows almost simultaneously into the dragon's eyes as it charges at them. This kills the dragon, and they head back down to the exit, where Fart grabs the egg. They then head for home, Fart leaving last, to hit a hostile Enderman in the groin with the dragon egg. They watch the credits, and one they finish, Fart is in a traumatic state believing that he "is love". Snake also comments that he feels enlightened. They quickly discover diamonds in a chest right next to them, and collect them. As they leave, YoDa states that he now has to leave, as he has just been grounded in the real world. As he leaves, he states "to defeat a griefer, you must not play his game". He then leaves the server. The group suddenly realise that they have no idea where they are. (Ep.9)The group wander aimlessly around their new surroundings, with N00bly consenting with Fart that the game should have motorcycles. Fart sudenly notices a village from over a hill, and the trio mistakenly believe the villagers to be other players. The villagers rush out to meet them halfway, and after their status is understood, the villagers hear out the trio's situation, and the apparent alpha villager states that they will provide them with a working map if they also help them with their own problems. Within the local tavern, the alpha villager explains that since most of the players left, they now have none to defend them from the roaming mobs that kill more of them every day. Fart asks for a moment for the trio to discuss their decision, which the alpha villager complies to. Fart tells the group that they should "pillage their village", which Noobly and Snake wordlessly disagree to. Suddenly, the village is besieged by mobs, and the trio realise the village's dire situation. Noobly, on behalf of the trio, rises to the challenge of defending the village. The next morning, they reach a plan of action: build a wall around the village, and seal it away from the outside enemies. Snake commandeers the local blacksmith forge and tasks Noobly and Fart with foraging for supplies for the wall. Upon their departure, Snake notices a trapdoor in the floor of the forge, and opens it, revealing a ladder going down into darkness. Meanwhile, Fart is cutting wood from the forest, when he is approached by a pig. Fart is about to beat it to death with his shovel, when he realises "how cute you ugly bastards are". He gives it a saddle which he took from the village stores, and rides it down to Noobly, who is mining cobblestone by a cave entrance. He then confuses Noobly with the fact that he named it Descartes, a famous french philosopher. The duo suddenly realise that several mobs await them in the cave. (Ep.10)Steambath wanders a landplot which he claims for his own as "Fappington Manor". The duo fight against the mobs, but N00bly realises that fighting is pointless, and the duo retreat, Fart naturally riding Descartes back. Meanwhile, Snake explores the cavern, and discovers the body of an iron golem with no head. He then retrieves the pickaxe, leaving his actions obscure. The duo return to the village, while the villagers have their problems furthened by the fact that the undead can now break down doors. After meeting with Snake, the group confront him with the fact that they most likely will not be able to build the wall in time. Nevertheless, they continue work, and construct as much of the wall as possible. The alpha villager is confused, and upon asking Noobly, Noobly explains that they will defend the breaches to the best of their ability, while the villagers hide indoors. As the sun sets, Fart quotes Fallout 3 ("War. War never changes."), which Noobly finds puzzling. The pair are standing sentinel by the wall, as night begins to fall. Fart and Noobly begin to talk casually, when suddenly, the mob hordes are seen just above the hill. Fart then concludes the episode in traditional N00b Adventures Cliffhanger fashion by putting his shades on, and making a decisive final quote ("Well bro, it looks like it's time to kick ass and eat porkchops. (puts on shades) And I'm all out of porkchops. (three arrows fly towards him, two of which hit the wall behind him, the third of which rebounds off his armour) Oooeah!") (Ep.11)The trio defend the breach in the wall, but are unable to kill all of the monsters before they arrive. Fart rides into battle with bow and sword, Descartes as his valiant steed, beheading the attackers. Noobly, meanwhile, fights exposed against the mobs, his inexperience not being a help, despite this, he manages to hold them off and attract the mobs' attention away from the breach. Fart then notices a Spider Jockey, and makes a beeline for it. Unfortunately, an intervening creeper blows him off Descartes, the latter now nothing but a Raw Porkchop. He is even more disenheartened at the loss of his shades, and screams in anguish. Category:Appearence Category:Characters